The Curious Garden Hose

Today (as with most days) didn’t go exactly the way I’d planned.

Take, for instance, the sewage mishap this afternoon…

Let’s start from the beginning…

Backstory first: We live in a house whose septic system has virtually collapsed. It works…kinda. The leech field was back-filling the septic tank so the landlord dug down to the connection between the two, then cut and capped it.

But somehow the septic tank was still filling up far too quickly.

For the last several months, the landlord has come over every 5-7 days to pump out the septic tank. And every time he comes, it’s nearly overflowing…especially when it rains.

We suspect that the tank has fractured somehow someway and thus fills with not only our waste water but also the surrounding groundwater. (I live in the mid-south where it rains MOST every day.)

Fast forward…

He came today, like any other day, and began the tedious work to uncover the lid of the tank and begin to pump it out…only this time something went wrong at our NEIGHBOR’s house! Yep! Somehow, the sewage that was being pumped came up in their yard and was running across their driveway!

When the landlord and I ran over to assess what happened, it became apparent that what was being pumped out must have found an underground gopher hole that acted like a channel and had a direct outlet at their driveway!

After apologies were made to our neighbors, I decided to get the hose and rinse their driveway and try to make it more bearable.

This is where things got weird…

I asked our neighbor where their front yard hose bib was. When I was told the location but that they didn’t have a hose, I went to our backyard to detach our hose so that I could bring it over to their house.

Detaching the hose was fairly easy, but when I carried it over to their house and tried to screw it onto their hose bib, it just wouldn’t screw on! I tried this way and that way, over and over, this angel and that, but it just wouldn’t screw on!

So….I thought maybe if I connected our front hose with our back hose, it might reach their driveway.

I go over to our front hose, take it off the rack, and drag it across our front yard just as far as it can go. It doesn’t look nearly long enough…but I remain hopeful.

I go over to where our other hose lays lifeless on their lawn and drag its end toward the hose I just stretched across our front yard, hoping beyond logical hope that it would fit, like just maybe by some Divine intervention the hoses would miraculously grow toward each other and meet in the middle! But…NOPE.

OK. I go back over to our neighbor’s house, grab the lifeless end of the hose I’d first brought over and tenaciously decide to try to screw it onto their hose bib one more time.

(Did I happen to mention it is HOT!!!?? Blazing sun, no breeze, sweat dripping like I’m losing water from every pore.)

I walk over to their hose bib with end of hose in hand, sweat dripping, say a prayer (yes, literally) then say “Lets try this one more time” and POOF! It screws right on like it was made for that hose bib…yeah, the very same hose bib that it wouldn’t screw onto no matter how hard I tried just a few moments earlier!

While I was screwing it on with ease, I began talking to God like a frustrated little child and the famous word, “Why? Why didn’t it work before? What was the deal? Was there a reason you kept it from screwing on before? Why?” I didn’t get disrespectful. I couldn’t. He’s GOD! But I did kinda whine before I finally succumbed, smiled, said “OK. Whatever. You know why. I don’t, and that’s OK.” I proceeded to spray off their driveway and then put both of my hoses back.

Is there a moral to this story?

Yep. There always is a moral when you place your trust in the Maker of all things. I think this time the moral to the story are the conclusions I came to:

1. Sometimes things don’t work the first time, but don’t let that stop you from trying because it may work if you try again.

2. Sometimes delays happen and we don’t know why but we don’t have to know why. God does and that’s good enough.

Have a blessed day!